Friday, August 25, 2006

VOTE DEMOCRAT because "Bush is a stupid liar"

We tell whoppers like the following, but claim Bush is the stupid liar. Funny stuff isn't it?
Bush stole the election in 2000. (no, seriously- we really believe this)
Bush not only knew about the 9/11 attacks but he ordered the demoliton of those buildings and faked the airplanes and terrorists. (no, seriously- we really believe this too)
Bush stole old people's Social Security money. (for real's)
Bush started the war in Iraq to make his friends at Haliburton rich. (no joke, war for oil dude)
Bush had a secret military draft developed just before the 2004 election. "vote or die". (We need to get out of Vietnam....errr I mean Iraq)
Bush blew up the levy's in New Orleans not hurricane Katrina. (We can't say that he didn't do it)
Bush's SUV caused hurricane Katrina. (your car is evil, gasoline must be eliminated, ride a bicycle)
Bush is the terrorists, Bush is the enemy. (Terrorists only hate us because they hate Bush, get rid of Bush and the terrorists become peace loving "freedom fighters").
Vote Democrat in '06.

Conservative Christians are all liars and racists. (why aren't they perfect like us liberals?)

Conservatives hate gays, immigrants and minorities by disagreeing with them. (Liberals love anyone who will join our Bush-Hate-Fest and would never disagree with anyone who will hate Bush)

This election is about two things for the conservatives:
"Love Jesus and Hate Immigrants".

(We say "Hate Jesus and Love those who cross our borders illegally and break our laws").

Why can't Christians do what Jesus teaches them to do? (Even though we don't believe in Jesus or God or any of that stuff, of course)

Conservatives LOSE another one. The Morning After Pill will be available WITHOUT a perscription! (uh oh, now with hundreds/thousands of ways to avoid getting pregnant including after fertilization, there should be almost zero abortions- right? shhh we'll keep quiet about this little fact).

Conservatives think they need to be able to own a gun to defend themselves... (If they weren't trying to defend themselves the criminals wouldn't attack them)

We hate all these conservative Christians ramming GOD down everyone elses throat. (while we ignore the fact that radical muslims brutally slit everyone elses throat)

If the voters put Democrats back in power this fall, the terrorists will stop attacking us, the economy will boom because of our big tax increases, there will be no more hurricanes because there will be no more SUV's or cars or oil, birds will sing and flowers will bloom.

Bush will be impeached and Cheney and Rove will be put in prison. Republicans will be destroyed and Democrats will reign for 100 years.

vote Democrat in 06 and forever.


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